I'll never forget the moment when I realized something was very wrong with me. I was standing in the shower, conditioner in hand, when I decided that the extra three minutes I would have to stand in the shower to apply said conditioner was simply more than I could handle. I had been inexplicably tired for months, and it was in this moment I realized that I had gone beyond the point of simply being lazy. Something was draining every ounce of energy I had from my body.
Before long, my entire body bore the evidence of my mystery illness. A number things were believed to be the culprit: my new house, the paint we used, my laundry soap, my body wash, my lymphnodes, an ulcer, and the list goes on. I spent months going from doctor to doctor, exhausted and getting worse, itchy, and in near constant pain. I looked nine months pregnant, yet no one could explain the fatigue or the anaphylaxis.
During this time, I was nearly too tired to get up and go to the bathroom on the weekends. I still tried to work, but even that ultimately suffered. The Mayo Clinic got involved, and after nearly 3 months I finally had an answer. I had a mass of tumors in and around my uterus that was sending all of my systems into some sort of autoimmune panic. Surgery was scheduled, and after 6 months I had 104 tumors (as well as some other body parts) removed, and have since felt like a new person.
I didn't realize how sick I actually was until I wasn't anymore.
Today, I went to spend the day with a friend which is something I very rarely do. I had a wonderful time, and on my way home I couldn't help but appreciate the fact that less than a year ago, a team of wild horses couldn't have dragged me out of my house. I smiled as I drove, noticing the beautiful colors of the trees, grateful to have some of my energy back.
This may be a short entry, but this something I am supremely grateful for because not long ago, we weren't sure I'd be here to type this.
~ A Very Much Alive Lolli
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